Finally, I am entering the home stretch! I will graduate on Saturday. Its hard to believe that I have spent six years in college. I should be very educated by now! This week at least will be laid back. I do not have to teach all week, just sit around and watch for three days.

It sounds strange but I am not ready to graduate! I am sure you are thinking I am crazy because I have spent six years in college already, but I am just not ready to be out in the world! When I was in graduate school, I was able to be home with my daughter. C only spent one month her first whole year of life in daycare. Since turning one, I have had observations/student teaching and she has been in daycare full time for almost 5 months. I miss my daughter! By working I have missed very important moments in her life. I missed her really walking ( I saw her first steps, but the day she took off, she was at daycare), her learning to say "Uh Oh", and her trying to give up her passy (okay maybe I am glad I do not have to deal with that). They may seem small to someone who is not a mom and may not understand, but to me they are monumental.

I will have this summer off with C, but then, assuming I get a job, I will have to put her back in daycare. I just feel like when I go to apply/interview for a job, I will be excited, but I will have a heavy heart. I did not realize the impact that becoming a parent has on someone. Don't get me wrong, I may be insane after a summer with my now toddler!

The debate in my head still rages on on whether or not I want to stay home. We can afford for me to day home, but life would be a lot easier if I went to work for all of us, especially future children.

Okay I think I am done rambling on about my personal battle. I should go back to watching the children (make that teenagers) that are presently in my care. Once upon a time they were, and probably still are someones baby.